Comedians for the State: ‘Nothing to Criticize’ Biden About

Now that Joe Biden is president, what will the late night comedy shows mock? Not the Democrat in the White House. Turns out, it’s now their job to simply defend Biden. After all, there is “nothing to criticize” the new president for. Jimmy Kimmel on Monday didn’t offer jokes so much as loud defenses of Biden and fact checking of random people on Twitter.

Kimmel complained, “President Biden has been working to undo many of the previous administration’s terrible ideas.” Instead of speaking truth to power, the sycophantic former comedian turned activist whined, “Meanwhile, over at Fox News, they don’t know what to do. They have nothing to criticize yet. So they’re focused on the idea that Joe Biden isn’t reaching across the aisle. As if he should be.”

 

 

Got that? There’s NOTHING to criticize yet. Good thing no one goes to Jimmy Kimmel for comedy or jokes about the day’s events. After playing a clip of Maria Bartiromo, the ABC host decried any outlet that would dare disagree with Biden:

MARIA BARTIROMO: You need to hear from the commander-in-chief to say stop the hate, stop the nonsense, stop the blacklisting, and stop doing what you’re doing to Trump allies. We’ll see if he says it.

KIMMEL:  Does she hear herself? Joe Biden, needs to stop the hate. Who started the hate? This is the new narrative.

Who started the hate? Maybe the guy who smeared Republicans as Nazis and called the American people stupid should look in the mirror. He’s the same person who said of Republican viewers: “Not good riddance, but riddance, adding, “If they’re so turned off by my opinion on health care and gun violence, then I don’t know. I probably won’t want to have a conversation with them anyway.” Sounds pretty hateful. 

Meanwhile, over on The Tonight Show, Jimmy Fallon said this about Donald Trump’s lawyers in the impeachment trial in the Senate: “What was the guy who defended Saddam Hussein not available?”

Lots of focus on Trump. Didn’t these liberal hosts want to move on? Apparently not. It’s not as though we have a new president and administration to make fun of.

The state-run comedy on ABC was sponsored by Macy’s. Click on the link to let them know what you think. 

Partial transcripts are below. Click “expand” to read more.

Jimmy Kimmel Live

2/1/2021

11:40 PM ET

JIMMY KIMMEL: President Biden has been working to undo many of the previous administration’s terrible ideas. But one thing he is apparently hanging onto is the Space Force. Turns out, the Space Force serves an important purpose. Which is, giving the coast guard someone to make fun of. It’s unclear what Biden will do with the Space Force,, since it was mostly just Trump pointing at the moon and telling Mike pence to go fetch. But whatever his plan is, the space force is here to stay. I get it. The last thing you want is to be the guy who shuts down the space force and then the next day aliens show up. Right?

This is the kind of dumb stuff we have to look forward to in the next four years, these desperate conspiracy theorists. This one involves the decor in the Oval Office. “Biden has already removed the bust of Churchill from the oval office and replaced it with a bust of Venezuelan socialist leader Chavez. Dark times lay ahead.” Here’s another. There are many. “Hugo Chavez used dominion voting machines to steal Venezuela elections. Is his bust in the Oval Office Biden’s way of telling us, ‘ha ha, yes I stole it?'” and that would be alarming, were it not for the fact that Joe Biden did not put a bust of Hugo Chavez in the Oval Office. He put a bust of Cesar Chavez in the Oval Office.

Cesar Chavez was an American civil rights leader and labor organizer. So, he is a totally different person. It happens. You know who I always get confused? Ben and Aretha Franklin. Which one flew the kite? Meanwhile, over at Fox News, they don’t know what to do. They have nothing to criticize yet. So they’re focused on the idea that Joe Biden isn’t reaching across the aisle. As if he should be. Yesterday, Maria Bartiromo made in making this case, made what has to be the least self-aware statement of the year so far.

MARIA BARTIROMO: You need to hear from the commander-in-chief to say stop the hate, stop the nonsense, stop the blacklisting, and stop doing what you’re doing to Trump allies. We’ll see if he says it.

KIMMEL:  Does she hear herself? Joe Biden, needs to stop the hate. Who started the hate? This is the new narrative.

 

The Tonight Show

2/1/2021

11:39 PM ET

REPORTER: Donald Trump has picked two new attorneys, David Schoen and Bruce Castor

REPORTER: David Schoen was consulting with Jeffrey Epstein before his death.

REPORTER: Bruce Castor, most notably, deciding not to go ahead with the prosecution of Bill Cosby in 2005.

FALLON: What was the guy who defended Saddam Hussein not available? I mean, even Rudy Giuliani thought, “You’re going with these guys?”

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